Wednesday, January 2, 2013

in the in-between

before Christmas i prep the house, clean it all up, and get it ready to set out decorations.
after Christmas, i don't mind taking down all the decorations or putting the regular home stuff back in its place, but i hate the in-between.

when decorations are littering the living room and surrounding areas, wrapping is still out, unpacking has not been done yet, and everything seems half done, i've found it hard to be joyful. we get home from traveling and i'm in a tizzy till all this house stuff gets taken care of. --almost as if the expectations i have of the entire upcoming year must be figured out and carried out in the first few days.

but i was talking with the hubs before we came home and i let him know that i am aware this is my pattern. -the discontentedness until everything is in its place. ain't that the way of it? me feigning control.

so this year i tried to gear up for the in-between. -when everything's up in the air and the kids are wired and out of sorts. i wanted to come home and not feel this immediate weight of get it all done NOW. and i have to admit that it's been hard. i want to hurry up so it can all feel settled. and that's silly. life is never really settled. there's always something up in the air. something left undone. something you wish you'd gotten to. so the conviction comes in when i realize that God settles my soul, not a clean house. God gives me peace, not having everything in its place.

so i'm taking it one step at a time. cleaning a room, putting something away, unpacking a bag. and i will keep plugging away at it because life just has these tasks that need to be done. and i can do it more joyfully when i remember that it is not the "done" list that satisfies. it's knowing i've lived the day for Him, and even on the days when i don't do it well, His grace is enough.

may we be satisfied in Him and learn to love Him more deeply, more dearly in this upcoming year.


  1. Oh man, you just put into words what I feel all the time. I always feel like the cleanliness of my house is the one thing I can control and so I overdo it. Thank you for writing this! You are awesome!

    1. i just write my struggles, because apparently i struggle with a lot. ;) thank God for grace, huh.
      hope your Christmas was wonderful!


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