enjoy your sunny side

this might come as a surprise to you, but marge ain't so good with the talkin'. we could make a whole segment out of horribly hilarious or terrifying experiences with my inability to express myself. it could be called marge's mangled mutterings. i'm all into this whole name-your-entries-and-make-them-segments thing. although sharing with all of you my most embarrassing stories WOULD be a hoot and a holler, i'll just share this one and then never ever do it again.

so here goes:

i was sitting next to a lovely older woman in a pedicure place while we waited for our nails to dry.
we started chatting (this is where i tend to fail epicly) and she was pretty excited that her life seemed to be coming together quite nicely with a new relationship and the like. and then it was time to go.

what i WANTED to say was something like "enjoy this beautiful day" and some combination of other words. but what came out was "enjoy your sunny side."

there you go, ladies and gentlemen. i am ridiculous and i get tongue tied. in truth, though, there ARE worse things i could have said. --so i'm ok with looking like a fool.
enjoy your sunny side, friends.

gabe gabs

here's another new segment called "gabe gabs" which is where i will share some encounters with gabe. he has started saying hilarious things and telling stories which make me happy.
here's one from last week:


gabe: i'm a daddy reindeer and i have three baby reindeer in my tummy. one's name is asher, one's name is elijah, and one's name is wisemen.
me: that's an interesting name, where did you get it?
gabe: the Bible. and they're not 5, they're 15 months so they have to stay in my tummy. one's in the other pipe. and my name is stop sign.

quality stuff, right?
the end

we're gonna make it after all...

a year ago today we received two precious children into our family, not knowing how temporary or permanent it would be. and today we are on our way to having them forever. before writing this post, i read the post from a year ago today entitled "welcome home" and truth be told, i remember that day to be a bit more horrific and terrifying than i let on. --so much so that i have called several people today and thanked them for helping us through such a rough time. on the post from a year ago, all the names are different (i was still playing around with their blog names), but the memory is very fresh. and now, 365 days after that post, we are doing ok. we have rough days. there is fighting, yelling, crying, and stomping of feet. --and then there's the kids' behaviors too! ;) other days are so serene i have to pinch myself to believe it can actually go this smoothly.

i am so glad we've lived to see the end of this year pass. we made it. by the grace of God, and i DO mean that, we have made it through. now all we have to do is adopt them, get through puberty with them, high school, college, marriage, and grandkids and we'll be in the clear. :) yes...i can see the light at the end of the tunnel.


so thank you guys for all your support this past year. thank you for giving me a thumbs up when i needed it. thanks for helping me to keep going. we really CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

below is a picture i had gabe draw me today. "our family." gabe is at the top because he said he's coming down a slide. an invisible slide. watch out for those. and elijah has a circle around his head because it's a hoodie. and the little antennae thingies? those are his ears. our radiant glow? our hair. and colalicious' tiny head? --because he's a baby, of course. and apparently babies look like lollipops. this is our family. soon to be our forever family. thank You, God, for these precious gifts. and help me to remember they are precious when they stink and scream and whine. You and i both know i do that, too. ;)

90 days

i was waiting to post this until i had a definite date. but looks like our case worker isn't returning phone calls these days.

so here's the news: z-diddy and colalicious are gonna be part of our forever family!

the 90 days is up. z-diddy and colalicious will be ours as soon as paperwork is done.
unfortunately CPS doesn't seem to be in as much of a hurry as we are. we'd like it to be finalized by the time we move, but that would mean CPS has to get their rear in gear. we are blessed to have a great case manager and a great lawyer, so hopefully they'll help us get the job done.

so... in a few months i will be presenting to you judah matthew and asher townsend. judah means "praise" and matthew is daddy's middle name, which means "gift from God." asher means "happy" and townsend is my grandmother's maiden name. asher and and judah are both tribes of israel. they were brothers, which is kinda convenient since these boys are biologically half-brothers. don't pee your pants. i'm excited too!!

marge in charge: older kids

i'm calling this segment 'marge in charge' because you always get my opinion, but now you've actually ASKED for it. what were you thinking? this is a big deal. here's the topic for today (thanks alena): what i think of fostering older kiddos.

gird your loins, people.

i can only talk about my own experience. sure, everybody knows somebody whose cousin's sister's neighbor fostered or adopted a child who was older who tried to kill them with a knife or run away or talked to themselves in third person. (i jest...sarcastic tone is rarely evident in blogging. sad day.)
as a case manager i dealt with older foster kids all the time. i've seen ones who dealt with it all pretty well and others who seemed truly incapable of healthy relationships and coping strategies.

z-diddy is the oldest kiddo to come to us straight from chaos. he spent 18 months in his bio home and 4 in a shelter. so at 22 months we received a child who was totally overwhelmed (so was i so we helped each other out with that one), unable to self-soothe, had difficulty learning cause and effect in any form, and attached to anyone including strangers like the orkin man who came to our house to spray for bugs. imagine if he had stayed in his previous situation longer.

he is the most difficult child i've ever parented and was definitely one of the most difficult kids i've ever worked with...and i've worked with A LOT of difficult kids. but he is pretty darn cute. i love him so much. and i wouldn't trade a hard day with him for anything. he and i are both right where we are supposed to be.



the truth of the matter is: whether you have a biological child or adopt or foster a child, you never know what you're getting. your parents didn't. --so don't take any flack from them. ;) anything could happen. there are no "sure things." each and every child deserves a family. we shouldn't exempt older kids from that right because they have more behavior issues or aren't as cuddly. i get that people want a little person who they can hold and snuggle with and love. but there are kids out there who have no chance unless someone comes along and guides them. you might be their only chance. you might be the only person who believes in them. you might be exactly God's plan for their lives. what an opportunity. what a ministry.

from my experience, people believe a lot of crazy stuff. and what's even crazier, they say it out loud for others to hear. i know that my husband and i speaking up for our kids and others like them has definitely raised awareness in our family and friends. so if you're called to adopt or foster an older kid, go for it and know you have my support...whatever that's worth. i make up great jingles and can probably put together some sort of cheer for you when needed. i give you mad props. you're going to have challenges like any other parent. and with God, you can absolutely do this.

so fostering and adopting older children definitely has risks like any other major decision in your life but i'm pretty sure these children are worth it. family might be against it, professionals might caution you, ignorant neighbors and coworkers might 'tsk tsk' and say you don't know what you're getting yourself into but God rescued us from much worse.


"open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy." prov 31:8-9

let's be counter-cultural, shall we?

gomer's house

so this weekend we went to visit our friends, stephanie and denbigh. this is their house. it's called gomer's house.
their story is amazing and you should read more about it on their blog listed below.

they bought this house and are slowly restoring it with plans to serve God however He calls them to. they have already seen God do amazing things and bring people into their path that needed help.

we had a great time with them during our visit and can't wait to see how God moves. they have a beautiful family, but even more beautiful is how they serve God wholeheartedly.

please check out their website: gomer's house
and check out stephanie's blog as well

my next post will be answering alena's question about fostering/adopting older children. i'm excited to answer my first feedback question! thanks alena!