one step closer to elijah

i have been biding my time, people. waiting, patiently waiting, for the time to tell you that parental rights were terminated for my little man (monkey). YIPPPPPEEEEEE!

we had a permanency hearing last week and knew that this would be the probable result, but didn't want to count our chickens before they hatched. and as of today at 9:30am, monkey's bio parents have no rights to him anymore.

i know where monkey comes from, i know what they did to him, i know how better off he is with us, i know how much we love him and how he fits in our family just perfectly. but my baby, as of this morning, is technically an orphan. he no longer has "parents" from his biological family. they have no rights to him. we are legally not his parents yet. it made me cry. i did NOT think i would have this reaction, but it caught me off guard. my little man legally no longer belongs to the family that brought him into this world. it truly is heartbreaking.

in our family, we have made up a song about the process to get monkey. it goes "one step closer to elijah" and we jam out to it. the kids don't know what it means, but they have fun dancing nonetheless.

what's next? we wait 90 days for extended family to come forward and attempt at getting him (which is unlikely). after the 90 days, paperwork begins to adopt him. and then we'll have our elijah.

God has seen us through this since may 27, 2009. He has held us in the palm of His hand when we cried over our 13 month old who wasn't able to crawl and was barely able to sit up. God has carried me through the not-knowing.

thank you for your prayers during this time. i have more to report on other happenings, but we'll have to wait until later.

round here

hello.

how are you guys doing?

it's been rough here while the hubs has been gone on the mission trip.

but we've all had enough with me talking about life being difficult, so let's move on.

i'll give you the skinny on all the goings-on:
1. my mom is fantastic! she came in to help us out while the hubs was away and let me just say, she is a laundry goddess (and good company too)
2. i would love a nap
3. had wine, cheese, crackers, and grapes with a wonderful friend and it was exactly what i needed
4. about 48 hours and counting until the hubs returns. we are desperately trying to avoid going to the ER with the baby until then. yes...he's sick again. feel like we've had this discussion before?
5. it's spring here in san antonio and it's all because God knew my boys needed outdoor time in order for them to remain alive
6. you know what's yummy? chips ahoy chewy cookies. up until 6pm today, that's all i had eaten
7. the throw up smell in the boys' room is almost gone. don't ask.
8. i'm having a maid come to my house and deep clean next week. my baseboards will finally be dusted! guests + no cleaning = amazingness.
9. triple bday party coming up for all three older boys. apparently we're obsessed with cars now, so that shall be the theme
10. my guilty pleasure is the real housewives on bravo. i'm watching it right now

anyways, nothing exciting to report. just life.

an outting

so we all went to chickfila today. myself and the four boys. no additional help. this was our first time doing this.

this is a big deal.

a very big deal.

i was prepared...i packed cups, wipes, diapers, and food for the baby.

i had a talk with the boys before we went in.

and they behaved.

they......

....behaved.

shock and awe, people...shock and awe.
this might not be surprising to anyone else, but it's quite the shocker for me. when people complimented me on them, i told them with complete truth that it was God's provision that, at this very moment, they were not biting, hitting, yelling, scratching, crying, or throwing food. they laughed. little did they know that there is nothing humorous about 3 toddlers/preschoolers slapping the snot out of each other at the dinner table.

so this was a victorious day. and no matter what else happens today: the ugly cry, lack of sharing, or throwing my freshly folded laundry all over the living room, i will remember that, for a meal in public, my children behaved.

-------------------"victory is mine trebek!" --will ferrell as sean connery--------------------------

a few weeks

so in 15 days, we will be in court for our little man. it'll be the pre-trial date to determine if the parents will get an extension or if rights will be terminated.

i am thinking about it non-stop. and praying about it constantly.

we want our little monkey FOREVER. and even if they terminate, it's not certain we'll get him. extended family has 90 days after that to come forward. on the other side, even if they offer an extension, it doesn't mean we will lose him. they could still not achieve their plan's goals and rights would then be terminated. then the 90 days for extended family would begin.

so basically we have awhile longer on this whole ordeal.

but i am eager to see how God works this out. my arms would feel so empty without him there. so i'm going to press on, knowing God has complete control over all of this.

but you better believe this: if we find out that rights are being terminated in a few weeks, you will hear a yell coming from the direction of san antonio that is the most victorious sound you've ever heard. that'll be me.